The exercise surprisingly helped a little. I was having a terrible week at work, I even had to go home from work early one day. Its been a very hard week with many manic episodes. It really has taken a toll on my "new" marriage, but hes a trooper and he stands by me. The exercise helped because I feel like that a lot of the time. I worry about others, and I have always put others needs before my own. I want others to be happy and flourish, and sometimes I need to put myself into that category as well.
The assessment process was interesting. Some of the ideas and questions were things that I had never thought about. I know that my main points of distress is the fact that I am an Empath and I absorb others negativity and emotions. I know that I must put up my shield to be able to deal with others. My greatest possibility for growth would be to help those with negative feelings so that in turn I am helping them, and then it helps me as well. I realize that this is not an instant gratification, I know that this will take time.
So, I discovered that everyone has things that they need to work on. I have to know and believe in myself that I am not "crazy" and I have to find different ways with dealing with emotions and my stress. I find comfort in knowing that others experience this as well, and I am not alone in this fight. My area of focus and development will always be on my stress management. I must and I mean MUST find a way to not let stress and anxiety control my life. It will ruin my life and the lives of others around me. I know that Meditation will be a great factor in all of this. Another will be just to breathe, I think that taking time and with a breathing exercise will help in the long run. There is a certain level of relaxation you obtain just from breathing and concentrating on it. I want to implement Reiki into my life as well. I think that the energy pulling will help, and I can get an outsider's prospective on what it is they see when they look at me.
Its an ongoing struggle, but I am more than ready to do anything to help alleviate the stress and the pain I feel on a daily basis.
--Sophie
Hi Sophie,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing. Your honesty is a breathe of fresh air. I was co-dependent for many years putting others needs in front of my own. I've learned to sweep my own side of the street and take care of myself. I like that you are thinking about meditation, reiki and other ways to control anxiety and stress. I've never tried Reiki before but I've received a lot of calmness from a centering practice, yoga and meditation. I'm not sure how Reiki would work with my negotiation clients. I might have to give it a try myself! Thank you for inspiring me. Dawn
I didn't really enjoy the loving kindness exercise the first time either, but I too found this time through to be more beneficial. I am glad that it was able to help you channel appreciation and love towards yourself. I understand that it is easy to get caught up in helping the needs of others and to forget about your own needs. I don't have kids yet, but between my fiancé, the house, and our dogs, I make sure I take time for myself - usually in the gym - to focus on what I want.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post and I understand how you feel. I think a lot of women struggle with how they feel about themselves. I really don't know why we do this to ourselves. It sounds like your on the right path to follow in order to strengthen yourself.
ReplyDeleteHope you have a nice Thanksgiving.
Sara
Hi Sophie,
ReplyDeleteI always enjoy reading your blogs. I also found a little help with my state of mind. I always find it hard to just sit down and do nothing. I have to work on finding a sense of calm.
Lynthia
I really enjoyed reading your post. I definitely can relate to your feelings. I struggle with the same issues and feeling about myself. Its really hard to move away from these types of habits but it seems you are putting in the effort and i'm sure it will pay off! I also found this exercise to be more beneficial than then the loving-kindness one! Keep up the great work! and thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your post, I'm glad I wasn't the only person who thought they were crazy before this exercise. You keep on going and good luck
ReplyDeleteHi Sophie. I could totally relate to you as to my situation at work at the moment with this guy I really had a crush on and was trying my all to just compliment him and try to get over being nervous about asking him out or at least to hang outside of work. I've been trying to get his attention since March and nothing. I learned that I had to stop focusing and looking for love in all the wrong places and start loving myself and the path I have chosen for myself in a better future with the career I've always dreamed of. You did very excellent!
ReplyDeleteSophie, that’s awesome that just the thought of your husband is able to calm you so much! My fiancé does the same thing for me, and I can relate with the intensity of emotions between the two of you. When my fiancé and I first met, we were in a position professionally where we were not permitted to date, so that fueled the fire that much more – the thought of a “forbidden love” made the chase more thrilling, but I admit, it was not the smartest idea I’ve ever had. In the end, it worked out for both of us and here we are getting married in 5 months – must’ve had a guardian angel or two looking out!!
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